To save thy sister
by sharingstories2
Summary: AUGGIE saw it, he saw his sisters downfall
1. Dear readers

Dear readers.

This is to address something that quite a few people have noticed, whether you have only read this story or others you may have noticed that a lot of my stories carry dark themes such as

· Suicide

· Mental illness

· Rape

· Abuse (of any kind)

· Self-harm

So I feel the need to stress this and I need your help. If you have read any of my stories and they have triggers, even if the trigger seems really remote could you please leave a review or private message, as much as the stories I write are for the reader's enjoyment sometimes they can be very triggering. Thank you.

That is not the reason I have written this note. I am here today to tell everyone that they are worth it, even if you don't believe it, I do. You are all stronger than what ails you and what ails you can be defeated, I believe that everyone has an inner battle inside them but you can survive. If you are experiencing anything, whether it be mental illness or you have been through a traumatic experience, hell even if you just feel sad or upset it is okay to get help. It is okay. I understand this is scary and it could mean that you will have to experience changes that you are not ready for but it will all be worth it. You can get there.

I want to wish everyone reading this all the happiness in the world, you deserve it. Remember you all have beautiful souls and its okay to feel sad and alone or whatever you are feeling. I want you to know that even if you feel like no one believes in you, I do.

Thank you all, I hope you all find happiness and joy in your lives.

\- Sharingstories2


	2. Chapter 1

Nobody saw it. Well except Auggie. He was older now at ten he understood the world better. He saw his sixteen year old sister fall, he saw but nobody else did. He saw her run to the bathroom every night with something shiny in her hand. He saw the smile that never reached. He saw the clothes that shrunk. The cries that were unanswered to every night. He saw her downfall.

After he came home from school he found police in the apartment, he saw his mother's tears and his father's tired eyes. He saw her friends huddled together all clutching pieces of paper. He found an envelope addressed to him on the table and he read.

**_Dear Auggie,_**

**_My sweet, sweet little brother. I wish it didn't have to be this way, I wish I could stay, I wish I could watch you grow and mature but I can't. The past two years have been hard and I'm afraid it is my time to go, my demon agreed. Tonight the deed shall be done and I will no longer be here. I will be in heaven. In know you're only ten and I know losing me so young but it will be better, you'll get all the love and attention this way without the annoying big sister breathing down your neck. Just remember that whenever you miss me I'll still be here at our place._**

**_I love you Auggie take care of yourself,_**

**_Love your big sister,_**

**_Riley._**

Auggie dropped the letter and began shaking. No, she wouldn't do this. He looked at his parents and then sprinted out the door.

He ran till he found it. Their special place away from all the mean people of the world. Admittedly it wasn't much just an old abandoned farmhouse they'd found whilst on a walk but to Auggie it was their special place. He found her just before she tipped the bottle of pills in her mouth.  
"NOOOO" He screamed. It was to late the bottle was empty."  
"Auggie…" Suddenly her vision blurred and Auggie ran towards her.  
"Riley please don't leave me I love you…. why did you do this!?"

"So I can be free little brother…. So I can be free"  
"Free of what?""  
"Free of the bully and the hate…" Riley closed her eyes. Auggie shook her. When she wouldn't wake up he phoned for an ambulance. When they came he travelled in the back attempting not to cry. His sister was dying and he couldn't saved her. That was the last thing Auggie thought before he collapsed.


	3. Chapter 2

When Auggie woke up he found himself sat in a bed that wasn't his own. He looked around to see doctors and nurses scurrying about. One these doctors, a sweet looking doctor came forward.  
"Hello sweetie I'm doctor Reynard I brought you here after you fainted can you tell me your name?." Auggie looked at her.  
"Auggie Matthews…. Where is my mummy and sister and daddy?." The doctor looked at Auggie sadly.  
"Auggie what do you remember?" Auggie wracked his brain.  
"My uh sister…. She tipped medicine in her mouth and uh…. Uh" suddenly Auggie started to cry.  
"Auggie sweetheart do you want me to call your mummy in here?" Auggie nodded.

Mrs Matthews ran in and hugged her little boy. Auggie cried into his mum's chest.  
"Why mummy why?"  
"I don't baby I don't…." Auggie carried on crying. All too soon Mr Matthews walked in and joined them.  
They stayed like that till Auggie asked,  
"Is Riley ok?" his parents looked at each other.  
"Auggie she'll be ok but how did you know where to find her?" Auggie looked down.  
"I uh read the letter and she said about how she'll always be at our place…."  
"What place Auggie?" Mrs Matthews asked.  
"Riley took me to the park but I ran off and she found me in an abandoned farmhouse….we kinda began making it a regular place to spend time together…. I just wanted to be with her and I found her just as just as…"  
"She poured the medicine into her mouth? "Auggie nodded.  
"I'm sorry mummy and daddy"  
"What for aug?"  
"I should've told you!" They shook their heads. They were losing both their children. One to suicide and the other to guilt.  
"Auggie listen to me carefully none of this is your fault this was Riley's choice and we will help her through whatever is going on ok?" Auggie suddenly felt defensive. It wasn't his sister's fault.  
"She said she didn't want to mum. She said she wanted to watch me grow up but she said she was being bullied and that was why she did it!." The Matthew's looked at each other. How could they have missed that?  
"We didn't know that Auggie, in no way is it Riley's fault for the way she feels and we will help her through it okay?." Auggie nodded and leant into his parents. Maybe tomorrow Riley would wake up and he could help save her and be a knight that stopped all the horrible people from hurting his innocent sister.


	4. Chapter 3

After begging and pleading with his parents to see his sister they finally relented. So as it was he walked through the doors of the hospital with slight fear. Would she be like how she was last time, on the brink of death or would she be happier.

When he was outside her door he turned to his parents

"Can… can I see her… alone." They took one look at his face and let him go.

Auggie sat at his sister's bedside, just hoping that she would be ok. A machine beeped in the background and various substances were injected in to Riley. Auggie took a deep breath.  
"Hi Riley, you always said that I shouldn't lie to you so I'm not going to" Auggie held back tears.  
"I… I don't really understand what's going on. I know that… that you wanted to die, mummy called it suicide I called it desperate. I don't really want you to go I know I don't get to decide. I just want you to know if you come home I'll be the bestest brother ever." With that he kissed her forehead and walked out.

* * *

As Auggie walked through the school doors he felt a sense of dread. It wasn't that he didn't like school. He did it was just that he wasn't ready for everyone's assumptions. So when he finally got through the doors of his school he kept his head down and ignored most of the glances everyone gave him. The day went pretty smoothly until dinner time when a group of girls started laughing at him.  
"Oh, poor, poor Auggie, his sister was too weak!" Auggie tried to keep his head down but a comment stopped him in his tracks.  
"I bet she did it just to get away from him!" suddenly all the upset and anger Auggie had felt returned. He pushed the girl over.  
"My big sister was the sweetest most loving person to have ever graced the planet, you didn't know her you idiot. If I ever hear you calling her again I will hurt you" suddenly he felt a small hand grab his arm.  
"Come on Aug" Ava said. Auggie let himself be pulled away, his face red from anger.

It was the next lesson he was called to the headmaster's office, upon explaining what had happened the headmaster let him off with a stern warning and sent him home. His parents didn't say anything but he could tell they were disappointed, so he ran into his room.


	5. Chapter 4

Auggie was Sat in Riley's bay window when Farkle showed up, both boys said nothing and Auggie was glad, silence was golden to the boy who knew that Farkle was the only one really there for Riley. Farkle looked at Auggie who had tears in his eyes, he wrapped his arm around the ten year old.

"I don't understand Farkle" there was a silence before Farkle answered.

"You do understand Auggie because deep down we all knew something had changed, we all knew she wasn't alright" Auggie started crying. His shoulder shook and his sobs echoed around the room and Farkle was glad that Mr Matthews was at school and Mrs Matthews was with Riley. Farkle pulled away and pulled out his letter.

"I was going to read it but I think it would be more beneficial if we did it together." Auggie nodded.

_**Dear Farkle,**_

_**My wonderful, brave Farkle.**_

_**I'm sorry, I truly am but I can't stay here anymore. I was going to run away but death gives you closure and saves a lot of time.**_

_**I know you tried Farkle and it'll be my second biggest regret to let your effort go to waste, my biggest Is knowing my baby brother will be blaming himself. He knew that something was wrong because he saw me. Yet it's not his fault, he's ten and bought into my excuses, look after him Farkle, I've only got one blood brother and he's the best.**_

_**Take care of yourself**_

_**Goodbye**_

_**Love Riley xox**_

Auggie Sat in silence, he couldn't comprehend that fact that Riley forgave him. Farkle stared at the boy, he looked broken and Farkle didn't know how to comfort him. So he wrapped his arms around him and let the boy cry. Riley had forgiven him, he just hoped Auggie could forgive himself.


	6. Chapter 5

Since Auggie had Farkle read him the letter he had settled down and stopped acting out, deciding keeping his head down. It had been three weeks since Riley's attempted suicide and as of yet she wasn't waking up. The doctors had said this was normal, she had taken a hefty amount of drugs and waking up now could cause brain damage. Mr Matthews had launched an appeal into outing Riley's bully. No one knew anything but it was just a matter of time. Mrs Matthews was slowly sinking into sadness but Auggie kept bringing her back and reminded her, it was no one's fault for the way Riley felt. Farkle had spent a lot of same with Auggie, making sure the boy felt involved in his sister's case. Maya had gone AWOL, skipping school with Lucas, trying to find calm in the storm. So no one had really recovered from the ordeal.  
Auggie had decided to go and find Maya who had avoided Riley like a plague, Farkle had taken him. The found her sipping on a beer and Auggie felt his anger rage .  
"Hey Aug" Maya said. Auggie grabbed the beer can and lobbed it across the room.  
"You choose bad stuff over your best friend" he said. Maya's eyes darkened.  
"Aug you wouldn't understand" Auggie sat down on the floor and crossed his arms.  
"She could be dying and you haven't had the guts to see her" Farkle put a hand on Aggie's shoulder  
"Aug, its okay maybe it's just too hard for her" Maya twiddled her thumb.  
"I want to see her but I can't, in her letter she told me that Lucas loved me and I love him, I don't want that to be the reason she you know" Auggie didn't reply but Farkle did.  
"Even so she needs your support, come on Aug" and together the boys left.  
That night when Auggie went to visit his sister he found Maya leaving the hospital and smiled. The sisters were reunited


	7. Chapter 6

**A/N TRIGGERING CONTENT**

Auggie didn't really know what to do anymore. Riley still hadn't woken up and her bully hadn't been found. He had an idea but he needed Farkle's help so that was why he had rung the boy, unfortunately the boy in question was running late. So Auggie sat and waited. When Farkle arrived Auggie explained his plan.  
"So you want to what, look through Riley's phone which the police have told your mum to keep under lock and key?" Auggie nodded, he knew where the phone was but he couldn't reach it.  
"Auggie, if the bully's had in any way inflicted pain on Riley other than words that could be classed as evidence and I don't really want to tamper with it." Auggie looked at the older boys worried face  
"Farkle, aren't you the least it curious on what pushed her over the edge when her other bullies failed to do so? I love my sister and I need to understand why she would want to leave me!" at the look in the boys eyes Farkle reluctantly agreed.

When Farkle came out of Mr and Mrs Matthews room he felt dirty, although he didn't see anything unsightly it was still rude to wander into their room. Nether the less he unlocked Riley's phone and sat down next to Auggie. Flicking through the messages he found an unknown number, so he read them.

_**Sup loser? You killed yourself yet?**_

_**I saw the cuts on your arms**_

_**OMG why the hell would you think Lucas liked you hahaha who would like a freak like you?**_

_**I swear to god you better kill yourself or I'll do it for you, you are such an ugly little weirdo. The worlds better off without you**_

_**You are such a bad sister/daughter. Your brother would be better off without you and you are nothing but a strain to your parents**_

The last one got to Auggie the most. He loved his sister more than anything in the world, he would kill whoever said this to her with his bare hands.  
"Now you know why we never showed them to you" both boys looked up to see Mr Matthews.  
"Auggie, I know you want to know more of what they said but give me the phone, you're just gonna hurt yourself" Auggie did as his father asked. Farkle looked at his teacher  
"I swear I'm going to kill them Mr Matthews" the man looked at him, tears pooling in his eyes.  
"Farkle, I read her letters, I know out of all her friends you were the only one that didn't hurt her. Yes I know about Maya and Lucas so I want to thank you for that but Riley would want to let go of all of your anger." Farkle gave a slight nod but looked at Auggie. Right there in that moment they both made an unspoken promise, they would find out who did this and make their life a living hell.


	8. Chapter 7

Operation _'make Riley's bully feel like they're living in hell'_ was a go. Auggie had told his parents of his plan, well part of it. Auggie was going to take part in suicide prevention, an organisation that helps suicidal people. Farkle on the other hand was going to try to find out who the bully was, he had the full support of the teachers, that was unless he did something drastic. Farkle had kept to staying on the down low, he had even gotten Maya involved in the plan. Auggie had some reservations at first but Maya had started returning to herself and was active in visiting Riley. Auggie had seen the change after they had confronted her, she was beginning to feel and he knew she felt guilty.

So with the help of Farkle and Maya they had found out that a substantial amount of people knew who Riley's bully was, or at least had suspicions. When they had told Mr Matthews he had set up a drop box, if a person was too scared to tell a teacher they could write it down and place the name in a box. The box was monitored by the head of the support team and the police. Auggie just wished that Riley would wake up, he was so tired of watching her sleep.

Fortunately his prayers were answered when the principal took him from his second period maths lesson. She wouldn't tell him what was wrong just that his parents had instructed him to go with Mr Minkus.

The Minkus's drove him to Riley's hospital, where Auggie subconsciously froze. His parents were crying, no, he was obviously overreacting. They wouldn't be crying because she's… no she couldn't be gone. When his brain kicked into gear he ran over to them.  
"Mummy, Daddy, no…" he yelled. When his parents saw him.  
"Auggie, oh Aug, she's awake" Topanga told him. Auggie looked at them confused  
"Then why are you crying?" he asked. His parents looked at each other, conveying a silent conversation. When they were done Topanga kneeled in front of the boy.  
"Aug… she's awake but she's not better… you know how she tried to… you know? She… when she realised she hadn't she got upset… she's awake but she doesn't want to be" Topanga was holding back sobs as she told him. Auggie looked at her scared  
"She will be though, she's Riley, she'll understand what she did was wrong and she'll get help" he told them. Topanga continued crying, she pulled Auggie closer, and Corey hugged them both to.  
"Oh Auggie, my sweet, brave little boy, I hope so, I really hope so"

Auggie felt the weight of the world on his shoulders, his sister was awake but it felt like the battle was just beginning. He thought she would wake up and want to get better, he never contemplated her wanting to do it again.

Auggie was sat on the couch, reading the letter he received from Riley when she left when Ava walked in.  
"It'll be okay" the girl said before even sitting down.  
"It'll be okay because she's Riley, the girl who talks to unicorns and convinced your mum that having our friendship would be great for you" Ava said. Auggie stood up  
"What if she doesn't want to be Riley Ava? I spent so long _knowing _who she was, she was the girl that believed in the impossible, that loved Pluto and would always say goodnight to me, even when we were fighting, and she was the girl that loved everything and everyone!" He threw his hands up in the air.  
"The problem is Ava, she isn't that girl and I knew she wasn't, I knew something was wrong, I should have said something. She isn't that girl Ava and it kills me because I don't know how long she was pretending to be! She doesn't want to live Ava, she has scars covering her body, scars that shouldn't be there. She was my big sister, she said she loved me, if she loved me so much why did she leave me? What did I do to her Ava, what did I do to make her not love me anymore" tears were pouring down his face. Ava felt her heart break, she pulled him into a hug and rubbed his back  
"You did nothing Aug, she was just lost and we could never have known." Auggie said nothing to the girl, he just let her try to ease away his worries.


	9. Chapter 8

Riley had been awake a month, Auggie had only seen her once, he could tell she was trying to remain calm. He heard his parents saying that Auggie was the only one that Riley seemed okay with. When her parents where there she rarely said a word, as for her friends she wrote them letters but refused to talk to them. Auggie wished he could be mad at her, mad that she wanted to leave him but he couldn't. He couldn't feel anything for the situation.

In fact the only time he felt anger towards her was when he found out she had tried to leave the hospital to do it again. He ranted to Ava about it before telling Farkle and Maya they better find her bully soon.

When he did find out she had tried to sneak away he had gone straight to her hospital room.  
"How could you?" he yelled. Riley shrunk back into her bed  
"You know?"  
"What do you think?" Auggie retorted. Riley hung her head, she felt bad for Auggie but he would eventually get over it. She was about to say so when Auggie exploded  
"Do you not care? You're my big sister Riley, the one that is meant to protect me, so why do you feel like killing yourself, do you not care? Is this because of that bully? You are giving them the power Riley, I love you, and does that count for anything?" he expected her to be apologetic, not angry so when she yelled back at him he took a step back.  
"What do you expect Auggie? I don't want to be here so why is everyone making sure I am? They never cared before, yes I get it Auggie you feel guilty but it wasn't your fault so stop dragging this out and let me die already! As for my bully, he was right, he was the only one that saw that I didn't belong, So Auggie tell me why the hell I should suffer to ease the conscience of the people who claim the love me now!" when she was done she clutched her chest and started hyperventilating. Auggie ran over to her and pressed the buzzer for help  
"Breathe" he commanded, it didn't help, Riley's eyes were alive with panic and Auggie kicked himself for yelling at her. That was the last thing she needed. Auggie felt hands on his shoulder, he looked up to see a nurse.  
"Come on kid, let the nurses do their jobs" the nurse then dragged him out the room all whilst Riley screamed his name.

Auggie was living with Farkle whilst his parents were with the hospital discussing plans for Riley, as such Farkle knew what had transpired at the hospital and was trying to help Auggie.  
"She's messed up Auggie"  
"I know"  
"They'll get her help"  
"I don't know if she will accept it."

Farkle didn't reply, Auggie didn't say anything else either, he just thought over what she said, after a while he jumped up.  
"Farkle she said the bully was a he" Farkle looked at him in surprise  
"That narrows down the list!" he yelled. Auggie nodded  
"Let's do some sleuthing Farkle, let's find out who this monster is."


	10. Chapter 9

Lucas had all but disappeared since Riley's suicide attempt, he skipped school and was rarely ever home. The last person that had seen him was Maya, when Maya started becoming herself Lucas had cut off contact. So nobody had seen him. That was until he caught her after school.  
"Maya" he had said as she left the school doors, Maya turned on her heels.  
"What are you doing here?"  
"I need to talk to you" Maya looked him up and down.  
"What about?" she asked. Lucas took a deep breath  
"I want to see Riley" he told her. Maya scrunched up her face, she shook her head.  
"No"  
"Why?"  
"You only want to see her because she woke up, how you know that I don't know but I refuse. I haven't even seen her, she hasn't asked for me and I don't deserve to see her. When she tried to kill herself we flew off the rails but it was you that gave me alcohol and told me that she hates us because of what she did. The thing is, she didn't, she was messed up and we abandoned her. I got better and controlled myself Lucas because I knew where my priorities lay, I helped in trying to find out who hurt her, I joined a suicide hotline. You know what, we don't deserve her because we never noticed, and Farkle and Auggie had been saying for weeks that something was wrong but we never listened. When we started to, you went off the rails, so screw you Lucas, screw you and you're messed up version of love."  
Lucas was gobsmacked, he never knew she felt that way. Maya stormed past him, on instinct he grabbed her arm. She spun to him, a fire in her eyes.  
"Get lost Lucas, you aren't welcome here anymore." Lucas let go, Maya scowled and walked away.

It was a Tuesday and as she did every Tuesday, Maya sat in the hospital waiting room. As always she knew Riley would say she didn't want to see anyone and Maya would still be sat in the cold hospital chairs until the visiting hour was up. However Riley said she wanted to see Maya, Maya was shocked but of course ran into the room.

Riley was sat in her bed, wrists bandaged and an IV drip attached.  
"Hey Riles" Maya started. Riley smiled at her  
"Hey" Riley replied. They stared at each other for a moment. Riley fidgeted with her blanket.  
"How've you been Maya?" she asked. Maya slowly walked over to the chair and sat down.  
"Uh… I've been good, you?" then Maya blanched  
"Sorry stupid question" Riley laughed. It was quite innocent but it brought a smile to Maya's face, maybe Riley was getting better if she could laugh.  
"It's okay Maya, you're not the first one that didn't know what to say, Farkle nearly fainted when I said I was ready to talk to him and my parents started crying" Maya shifted uncomftably. She could understand their reactions, if she was honest she felt like doing the same.  
"So… why now?" she asked. Riley didn't need her to explain what she meant. She knew that she had blocked everybody out.  
"I don't know if you know but Auggie isn't seeing me. When he did he mentioned that you'd been drinking and skiving school."

Maya frowned, she wished that he hadn't told her.  
"Yeah, I'm okay now. I realised that what I was doing wasn't helping but I'd much rather hear how you're doing." Riley frowned, she leaned back.  
"Don't do that Maya" she asked. Maya looked confused  
"Do what?"  
"Try to find out if my answer is that I don't want to die anymore, you know it won't be" Riley practically growled. Maya just nodded  
"Okay, I'm sorry I just… you know?" she tried to asked. Riley just nodded as a nurse walked in  
"Sorry honey, visiting hours are over" Maya nodded and turned to leave, Riley shouted her name and she turned around.  
"Listen Maya… I think I may be going away for a while… take care of yourself okay?" Maya nodded  
"See you around peaches, love you" Riley didn't respond as Maya was taken away.


	11. Chapter 10

Auggie was on a mission, he had been recently told that Riley was going somewhere to receive help and he wanted to catch the bully that did this to her. Farkle had found out that even though Riley couldn't receive them she was still being sent messages. When Maya had found out she had gone on a tirade through the school, threatening everyone and punching walls. So Auggie had been left to find the mysterious bully. So he had decided to do the one thing no one seemed to do, ask Riley. He had made amends with Riley when he found out she was going away. The two had gotten so close that Auggie had begged for her to stay a little closer to home, they had of course said no. They were sending her to the best clinic possible.

So Auggie, with Ava in tow had gone to visit Riley. When they wandered in Riley's face lit up.  
"Ava, Auggie, how are you both?" they looked at each other, uncertainty.  
"We're good Riley… we need to talk and you're not going to like it. Riley I really need to know, who was bullying you?" Riley stiffened, she looked at Auggie like she'd never seen him before.  
"Why do you want to know?" she asked, scared. Auggie sat on the edge of her bed and rested a hand on her knee.  
"You're going away Riley and this person has to be caught before you come back… I just I can't stand it that he is still out there, you owe me this."

Riley looked down and for a moment Auggie thought he had gone too far, he glanced at Ava who shook her head. Just when Auggie felt like she was going to kick him out she spoke.  
"He… well the main one was a he, he used to tell me that the reason I was so happy was because if I wasn't you would all abandon me… I just. I wanted to believe that he was horrible because he was sad but he wasn't. His family loved him, his sister worshipped him and he just hated me. I don't even know why, I didn't know him. It started as a few choice words before he started filming me and texting me. Oh god Auggie, I wanted to understand." Auggie pulled her into a hug as she continued her heart wrenching confession.  
"He… he told me that I was doing everyone a disservice by staying alive but I didn't have the guts to kill myself…. So I hurt myself instead. A punishment for being weak… when I was trying to end everything… he…" she burst into louder sobs and Auggie hugged her tighter. He was going to make them pay, he maybe ten but lord help the person that messed with his sister.  
"He… told me that you would be happy, you wanted me dead but I knew it wasn't true, or I do now I was just so upset at the time that I believed it."  
Auggie could feel his own tears starting to fall, he leaned forward and kissed her forehead  
"I'd rather be dead than without you Riley, you are the best big sister ever."

Riley smiled, a watery smile but a smile nether the less. When she pulled back Riley spoke  
"Hey Aug, visiting is nearly over but do you mind if I speak to Ava for a minuet" Auggie looked at her confused but left the two girls alone.

Ava neared Riley's bed  
"Ava… I know that you and Auggie have acted really mature about the entire situation with me, especially for ten year olds. I just need to know, will you look after him? I know you've got a lot to deal with but that boy is one of the only reasons I'm hanging on." Ava nodded  
"Riley… I think what you did was incredibly daft but I also don't understand why you did it, I don't have a sibling relationship but I just wish you knew how much you meant to Auggie." She then leaned up and hugged the teenage girl  
"I love you Riley and I hope you get better" then the girl left, leaving Riley to contemplate whether what she tried to do was really worth it.


	12. Chapter 11

Riley had already said goodbye to her 'friends' the night before, no one had cried but they were all solemn. So before Riley left for the institution she said goodbye to Auggie. The boy tried not to cry but he didn't understand why she had to go so far away, surely they could look after her in the hospital?. His parents had shot the idea down but Auggie was still convinced they wanted her out of the way, Auggie wanted her close by.

So as it was he tried not to cry but when Riley pulled him into a hug he burst into tears, his parents came over to comfort him but Riley shook her head. She pulled back and kissed his forehead  
"It'll all be okay Auggie" she promised, she didn't know how it would be okay but she would make sure he was okay.  
"I… promise you'll get better Riley" he asked. Riley looked at him sadly, she didn't want to lie to him but at the same time he was only a child. She couldn't break his heart, so she took a deep breath and looked to her wrists.  
"I want to be happy Auggie… I just I don't know how to, I promise to try though" this seemed to appease the ten year old. Topanga looked at her daughter proudly, she was handling the situation very maturely.  
"I love you big sister" Riley looked up and gulped, trying her hardest not to cry.  
"I love you little brother" then she pulled away. Auggie looked at her sadly, Riley wiped away her tears  
"It's time for me to go Auggie" Auggie just nodded, he didn't want her to go but what could he do?. Topanga pulled Riley into a hug.  
"I love you so much sweetheart" Riley began crying as her mother hugged her, she wanted to be angry at her parents but she couldn't. They were Corey and Topanga and they had tried to give her the best of everything. When Riley pulled back she turned to Corey and pulled him into a heart wrenching hug.  
"I love you daddy" she sobbed, Corey tried to be strong but he could feel his own heart break  
"I love you too sweetie" when she pulled back she gave everyone a watery smile before grabbing onto the hand of her doctor and following him into the institution. Riley Matthews was gone, or at least for a few weeks.

It was two weeks after Riley had been admitted that Auggie asked to go to Corey's office after school. Ava's mother, who had been babysitting him decided to take him, when Auggie walked into his father's office Corey stood up.  
"Aug, what are you doing here?" he asked.

Auggie ran over to his father  
"I need to see the principle, before Riley left she told me who had been bullying her" Corey looked at his son in surprise before grabbing his hand and taking him to the principle. When the Matthews walked in the principle looked up in surprise.  
"Corey, what can I do for you?" he asked. Corey looked to Auggie who spoke.  
"I know who it is sir, I know who was bullying my sister."


	13. Chapter 12

Riley had been admitted for close to three months before being released into the care of her parents, in that time Auggie had only visited her once, it wasn't his favourite memory. Walking into the institution felt like walking into a jail, he didn't let that deter him though, he was far too excited. So when he was let into the visiting area he was sad to notice his sister looked very haggard. Her eyes were tires, she looked thinner and bags had long since formed under her eyes. She seemed very distant throughout the entire visit and only spoke when spoken too, it was like she wasn't even there. Auggie felt like when she hugged him he was being hugged by a complete stranger.

It was due to this that Auggie had made sure that her bully got at least some kind of punishment, as it was he had been excluded from school untold they thought he could be trusted and instead of facing jail time for harassing Riley he was given community service. All his communication was tapped and he could not be within a hundred feet of Riley. All in all Auggie was fairly pleased with the results his mother got. It seemed Riley was too, she had thanked everyone for their part.

So Auggie was feeling fairly confident to see his sister once more, only when he saw her she looked tired. She looked happy but tired all the same, she was sat on the couch, watching something on the TV.  
"Hey Aug" she said when he entered, he threw his school bag on the floor and ran to his sister, slowing down slightly before he hugged her. She seemed frail, as if the weight on her bones had completely dissipated. Riley hugged him back  
"I… I've missed you Aug" he smiled, a watery smile.  
"I've missed you too… so are you okay now?" he asked, then he flinched as if he had hurt her.  
"I'm sorry" he said quietly, Riley laughed  
"No I should be sorry, look we can talk about all of the horrible nitty gritty things soon but for now I want to hear how my little brother is doing."

So, for the next few hours Auggie told her about Ava and school and how his life had been. All in all, it seemed despite the circumstances Auggie had tried to be positive. Riley was happy at the fact which is why she felt so guilty of what she asked her parents when Auggie had gone to bed.  
"I want to go to the farmhouse" their reactions were almost comical. Topanga dropped the spoon she was holding and Corey stared at his daughter in shock. They were about to protest but Riley cut them off.  
"Look, I get it I tried to do something bad and going there probably won't help me in the slightest but Auggie needs closure and I think that he'll get it there." Corey frowned but Topanga tried to protest even more.  
"Then we'll take him there Riley" Riley shook her head.  
"Mum, I understand you're scared but I promise you that I won't be alone, you two can be there and if it gets too much then I'll leave but I need to do this. Auggie needs _closure _he needs me to be there. You weren't there, Auggie was and we need to talk about it but we need to go there to see that me being alive is reality. The last thing I saw was Auggie's tears, I saw my sweet baby cry his heart out at my selfish decision as he tried to wake me up. I need to prove to him and myself that he did the right thing" by the time she finished everyone had tears in their eyes. Corey pulled his baby girl into a hug and tried to steady his breathing.  
"We'll let you do it but we are driving there and we will be within range"  
"We'll be checking your bags as well, it's not that we don't trust you but we love you" Topanga said, Riley smiled and hugged her mother.  
"I love you mummy"  
"I love you too Riley."

That night Riley went to sleep with a grim smile on her face, facing the place where she committed suicide would be hard but it wasn't about her anymore, it was about Auggie and trying to help him.


	14. Chapter 13

The next day Riley got up, took her medicine and got dressed for the day ahead. She didn't tell Auggie where they were going, just that he needed to bring his hat and gloves because it was cold. When their parents pulled up outside the barn house Auggie paled.  
"Riley, what's going on?" Riley didn't answer but Topanga did  
"I spoke to your therapist Auggie… he thinks that to confront everything you need to come back"  
"Then why is Riley here?" he asked.  
"Because I need to confront it to" she said quietly before getting out the car, after a quick look to his mum he followed his big sister.

Riley stood at the door and breathed deeply  
"Riles… are you okay?" Auggie asked. Riley blinked back tears, she wouldn't cry, she grabbed Auggie's hand and swallowed back a lump in her throat.  
"Yeah… it's just I remember it you know?" Auggie nodded and slowly they walked forward.

Auggie looked around the room, he could remember every vivid detail of what Riley had tried to do. Riley sat on a bale of hay and watched him sadly, she had scarred him more than she had meant to.  
"I never said thank you, you saved me" she said lightly, Auggie frowned  
"You should never have done anything that you needed something" then he shrunk back. Riley hung her head  
"It's okay to be angry Auggie, I tried to kill myself" he flinched at her bluntness.  
"Then I tainted our place and yelled at you to just let me die, I deserve your anger" Auggie shook his head, as if trying to clear the memories. He tried to stop tears running down his face.  
"Why'd you do it Riley, why couldn't you survive…. For me?" Riley felt her heart break and pulled him into a bone crushing hug. He sobbed into her shoulder and Riley rubbed his back soothingly.  
"It's time to be completely honest Auggie and truthfully I feel terrible because you're only young and you shouldn't have to listen to this but it was not your fault. If anything, you kept me going, the way you would yell at Maya, yes, I heard that, and tell her that something was wrong, the way you and Farkle would discuss what was wrong with me. You kept me going Auggie so do not, for one second thing you were worth nothing to me, you are the reason I did it here, it was selfish and disgusting but the only happy memories I have had in the past year or so is here, with you and I wanted the last image I see to be of somewhere I loved." Auggie just cried harder, Riley tried to calm him down but his sobs became harder and more violent until he was shaking.

It took a while but eventually his sobs subsided and they were just sat in the middle of the floor.  
"You know, I know what you and Farkle did, with the bullies and everything" Auggie smiled at her sadly  
"I… we I don't know, I needed to do something, I hate him Riley, I hate him so, so much" he said. Riley pushed Auggie's hair from his eyes.  
"You shouldn't Auggie, I don't" Auggie looked at her surprised so she explained.  
"I did, for a long time I hated him, I hated everyone to be honest. I hated the way that he made me feel as if I was the wrong one, he got inside my head and I couldn't get him out. I hated that because of his actions I felt worthless but he wasn't the reason I tried to do it Auggie… what he did manifested a larger issue inside of me. I wasn't happy and for the life of me I didn't know why… _I tried so hard to be happy._ Yet no matter what I did I just felt alone, totally and utterly alone and I was scared, terrified that the constant fear of everything was suffocating me. I don't hate him Auggie, I can't hold on to the hate, it turned me butter and suicidal… I can't hate him Auggie because Hate breeds hate and I don't want that so please for me, don't hate him, you don't have to forgive him, I can't but don't hate him." Auggie nodded.

They sat there for a while, soaking in each other's emptions  
"You ready to go home Auggie?" Auggie nodded and together they walked away from the farmhouse, feeling like they finally had acceptance.


	15. Chapter 14

Auggie was sat in Topanga's with Riley, he was happy that he had finally got her out the house. Since she had been home she had stayed away from the outside world, choosing to stay indoors until it was time for Therapy and then she left for a while. Today though was different, today Farkle was coming, with Maya. Farkle had been a rock to Riley, he had been there every day and together he and Auggie had caught Riley's bully. Maya was a different story however, it was obvious Riley still loved Maya, it was obvious by the amount of times she asked about her but the wounds were still to fresh. Today though Riley felt strong enough to see her. The girl walked in, she looked at Riley carefully, as if she was assessing her.  
"What no hug?" asked Riley, the affect was instantaneous. Maya launched herself into Riley's arms. Riley soothed the girl  
"I'd say this was a bay window moment but it's currently taken by my parents so this'll have to do" Maya laughed, after a minute or two she sat down next to Farkle.  
"Listen… I wanted to apologise, I hurt you and that was not okay" Riley began  
"It's fine Riley, you weren't well" Maya protested, Riley laughed scornfully.  
"I was suicidal and selfish Maya and I'm sorry. I'm sorry I didn't see how life was giving me lessons and I'm sorry I stopped believing"  
"It's okay, I'm sorry I never noticed"  
"You're forgiven"  
"So are you" and then the best friends launched into a conversation about the pointless things that had been happening and for once Farkle and Auggie didn't mind. They didn't mind because Riley was beginning to be Riley again and they could take anything thrown at them so long as she stayed that way.

* * *

It had been two years since Riley's suicide attempt and in that time, she had accomplished many things she was proud of. The thing she was proudest of most however was Auggie, her little brother was a continued support in helping her fight her demons. He was there at two o'clock in the morning with ice cream when her demons were winning and he was her three o'clock in the afternoon text to remind her that she was worth it. He was the only one that believed from the very beginning she could be saved.

It was two years since Riley's suicide attempt and Auggie was officially thirteen, Riley had organised his birthday party at Topanga's and had made sure everyone he knew and loved was there. She, however had taken herself away from the party, it had been two years but people still watched her like a hawk. She hoped Auggie wouldn't notice but her annoyingly perceptive brother did, he followed her onto the roof where she sat taking dee breaths.  
"Are you okay Riles?" he asked, Riley smiled  
"Yeah, just feeling claustrophobic, I'm fine, you should go back downstairs, you after, after all the guest of honour." Auggie laughed, he sat next to Riley  
"Have you had your pills?" he asked, she shot him a look.  
"Yeah, I'm just claustrophobic Auggie, it's nothing to do with that, anyway it's your birthday, you shouldn't be worrying about me, go and have some fun" Auggie smiled, he wrapped his arms around her.  
"I appreciate it you know, I know you hate parties and stuff but you threw me a party and turned up without mum or dad telling you to" he said. She grinned at him  
"Anything for you, now go on, I'll be down in a minuet you go and enjoy yourself" he kissed her cheek and turned to leave but stopped at the door.  
"Do you ever wish that you had died?" at this Riley's head spun around.  
"No, do you ever wish that you had let me?"  
"No"  
"Then I guess we both succeeded in what we wished for, happy birthday Auggie"  
"Thanks, I love you Riley"  
"I love you too little brother" and then the birthday boy left his sister on the rooftop.

* * *

It had been two years since Riley's suicide and she wasn't sure the pain would ever go away but she did know that with Auggie by her side she would be able to see the sunshine on even the rainiest of days.


	16. Thank you

Dear readers,

Well our journey has come to end _to save thy sister _is now complete and I want to thank you all for your continued support, you can not even begin to imagine how much your comments, favourites, follows and support mean to me. I hope you have all enjoyed this story.

~sharingstories2


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